You Don't Get More Points for Willpower

Guilt often comes from thinking “I should know better, or I could choose better.”

As if each and every decision we make is carefully calculated in a vacuum, devoid of external influence or other factors beyond You The Decider.

We do stuff all the time because that’s just “what you do”.

Whether you do something because you actively and purposely will it, or because you were pressured, the final result is the same.

For example, these each lead to the same outcome:

You went running because…

• you feel it’s a good thing to do
• you told your friend you would
• you promised you’d go with your friend
• you think God wants you to
• you joined a running group & want to meet someone
• you were being chased by a bear

The point is you went running. You aren’t a better person because you did it for the “right reason” or because “You Chose To”.

If you want to something figure out what makes it so you have to do the thing, so that there’s no decision, so that it’s just what you do.

Discover what turns an obligation from “I should do it” to “That’s just who I am”.

Having to relitigate every little decision in one’s life is paralyzing, so get on with it.

The Links

The founder of Gawker in 2002 on San Francisco

Amazing for what it gets right even while ultimately being worng.

Redef CEO Jason Hirschhorn on the media business

The host is condescending and elitist as hell, but the guest is awesome. Goes into detail on how Netflix was laughed at when it was first purchasing content rights, a lunch with Bob Iger (CEO of Disney), his relationship with the Murdochs and insight into Fox News, and other cool inside baseball stuff.

Working with Steve Jobs to create Safari

Don Melton didn’t work with Steve a ton, but he has some of the best “inside Apple” articles about its renaissance on the Internet.

Where unmarried, virgin adult Mormons go for summer camp

Watching this makes me deeply sad in a way that’s hard to describe.

Imagine missing out on one of life’s most rewarding experiences (i.e. deep relationships) because of some idiosyncratic belief you hold because of where you were born.

There are worse horrors to be sure, but what makes this a tragedy is how completely avoidable it is.

A tweet from Ed Latimore

“The more intelligent you are, the more you consider what can go wrong. This awareness often leads to inaction.

“This is why sharp intellect must be married to wicked resolve and indomitable courage to be most effective.”

I was talking to an entrepreneur friend at dinner a few weeks ago. He said “I don’t do stupid things anymore.”

We both lamented how if we were starting today we’d each never had begun our respective businesses that became successful. It was only in a time of youth and naivete that we got started.

Sometimes experience is just another word for pessimism.

This was originally published in my weekly newsletter, How It Actually Works.